Special Review: Dinosaur Island (1994)

Oh Yeah, a softcore 90's boobs parody FTW. And a compilation to the cavegirls in bikini thing I did when I just started the blog. But this movie is more than just nudity. It's hilarious, and is quickly becoming one of my favorite bad movies.

So we begin with  nude women and BOOBS when a tribe of sexy cavegirls sacrifice a blonde to a woman- eating Rubbersaur! All this to the tunes of some funky jungle drums. And then suddenly we are on a plane over the Pacific, and with some American (Fuck Yeah!) soldiers. It's actually a prison transport where a grumpy old captain is taking three troublemakers home for Court Martial. The three soldiers are quite stereotypical too, one is a Trickster and womanizer, one is a nerd and the third is a fat coward. It's also funny how none of them actually look like a soldier, nor behave like ones. The plane crash into the sea, not that we actually see this, suddenly they just wash ashore on an island. We also have some retarded exposition, oh how I love retarded exposition. The acting is hilariously terribad, the lines are ingenuously dumb and cheesy, the cuts are weird and not especially smooth, the dinosaurs look like shit... THIS IS GOLD! Fun for the whole family.... wait... no...

The thing with these all female tribes out on uncharted islands though... how do they reproduce when men not happen to wash ashore on their island? How come there are sexy women from the age 18 to milf, but no old women or children? And since they obviously need men for reproduction, how come they are always very hostile towards the men who do arrive on the island and all too willing to kill them? I know they explain it with them being very long lived because the volcanic water on the island is magic, but it still doesn't make any sense. Anyway, the story is as juicy as it sounds. The soldiers are captured and are going to be killed when they just happen to convince the tribe they're the Gods promised by the ancient prophecies, however now they have to prove themselves by killing the Great One (the T-Rex). That's pretty much it. There are actually not that many sex scenes, and the few there is are actually quite good. There are a lot of nudity though through the entire movie.

It's a fun ride. The bad acting and the hilarious lines make it very enjoyable, as well as the cheesy story that obviously don't take itself seriously at all. I'd gladly recommend this one.